Wednesday, October 21, 2009

A Life Changing Formula

By Jason Kendall

Having a resistance to change is normal - even when we know that a major re-think is needed. We fear the unknown, that the price we have to pay for change might be just too big, and that things might actually get worse, not better.

But the fear that holds us back is often nothing more than an imaginary barrier that we've created in our mind. To overcome this barrier, we need to massively outweigh the negative obstacles we're envisioning, by replacing them with even bigger reasons to move forward.

Here's a mathematical formula for change: D x V + F is greater than R ...or... Dissatisfaction x Vision + First Steps is greater than Resistance to Change.

We have to make our reasons for doing something greater than our resistance to change. When we're looking to make changes, it's usually because we've got sick and tired of putting up with the circumstances of our current existence. Whether it's our job, relationships, career, lack of money - whatever we're dissatisfied with, we have to analyse the problem and make it a motivating force for action. In other words, we need to get down and dirty and really be honest with ourselves; life has much more to offer than the scraps we're getting, and we're not going to miss out any longer.

The power of this dissatisfaction can be multiplied by envisioning how good things will be once we've made the changes. To mentally focus on a life of plenty is a great feeling - we're in control of our destiny because we took responsibility for change. Our resolve becomes stronger the more we can visualise our success.

It's impossible for our minds to hold positive and negative thoughts at the same time, so by actively pushing out the negative thoughts with positive ones, we weaken the power those downbeat feelings had over us, and strengthen our will.

Once we're mentally prepared, we can add the first steps towards change. Small, encouraging moves build confidence, and we start to generate a positive feedback loop which pushes us to more action and then more self-esteem and confidence. Building on these areas eventually overcomes and breaks down our resistance to change.

A member of the Scottish Himalayan Expedition, W N Murray wrote:

"...Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: That truth is, the moment one commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events occur once the decision is made, raising in ones favour all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way."

Similarly Goethe said, "Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now."

A book written in our own time says it all. "Who Moved My Cheese" by acclaimed author Spencer Johnson acknowledges the different ways we respond when there's a need for change. It's easy to think that those who achieve in life are lucky, that somehow things were simpler for them - they had the breaks. The truth is we make our own luck, by deciding when to make a move, and then committing wholeheartedly to its execution.

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